Life is but a moment,

death also is but another.
Robert H. Schuller 1926 – )

We are all a product of the influence and guidance, the love and support of those with whom we have shared the journey of life. There is surely no greater gift of respect we can give than to acknowledge the role they have played, the impact of their actions, and to present a lasting tribute to them when they are no longer a part of our day-to-day world. Though no longer present in body, their influence and love remains, like a lighthouse guiding us over rough seas and leading us home. Thus, this is a very special department which is available to any fellow member of the 'country family' who would like to have the opportunity to publicly acknowledge the life of one who has been lost.

A TRIBUTE TO ‘MY LIGHTHOUSE’

NESSIE ROOTES

1913 – 2005

Today as I write this it is the beginning of December 2006, and the first anniversary of the death of my beloved Aunty Ness. She was my great protector, my endless friend, my teacher, my confidant, my inspirer. A scrapbook her nurse made me a couple of years prior to her death was addressed to me as “the son I never had, my friend, my darling boy.” She was the world to me and as I matured from adolescent to adult I began to realise just how important she had been to me throughout my life, and how grateful I am for her unquestioned, endless love.

I don’t quite know why but I have, in recent times, made a deep connection between my darling Nessie and the song by Amity Dry entitled “The Lighthouse”. This is what she was for me, a beacon leading me home. To quote the lyrics … “The worst thing is the silence ringing in my ears, and waking up from a dream to remember you’re not here. And some days I'm so lonely I can barely even breathe, but then something will remind me that you're still right here with me. And you're the lighthouse leading me home, guiding me through every storm. And you're the sun that shines on my face, the warming embrace, the light of my days … you’re the lighthouse.”

My ‘lighthouse’ was born to a woman who, for whatever reasons, put Nessie up for adoption soon after her birth. She was adopted by Lavinia and John Hambly and lived her early years in Southport on the Queensland Gold Coast and then in Brisbane before moving back to the Gold Coast where she ultimately met and married John Rootes. They were extremely successful in business, Nessie owning a cake shop and then later operating the retail arm of the local newspaper, the Gold Coast Bulletin (of which Uncle John was Managing Director).

Sadly, Aunty Ness and Uncle John could not have children, and as business interests evolved to be the focus of her husband’s life, Nessie became involved in a wide gamut of creative pursuits … from pottery to music and musical theatre. She joined The Gold Coast Little Theatre and starred in many roles, her most renowned being the part of Bloody Mary in ‘South Pacific’.

When I was only very young, my family moved next door to Nessie and John, and therein a lifelong relationship was established. For me it was to become a relationship which far exceeded the limitations of love, for Aunty Ness became my safe place to go when domestic disturbances on my home front escalated. She was the one person throughout my formative years to teach, and to show me, the meaning of unconditional love. She was a constant in a difficult world and for this I will be eternally grateful. This was the foundation of my lifelong love of my Aunty Ness, something that will always remain.

I could write volumes about the legacy of this remarkable woman who, despite her own problems and hardships, never failed to support and encourage me as I began my walk in life after leaving school and the years that followed. I could recount all the memorable gatherings and Christmases, Sunday barbeques around the pool and birthday celebrations. I could tell of the quiet times of an early morning in bed with Nessie having tea or sitting with her of an afternoon watching the activity on The Broadwater and talking about the important and the trivial alike. I could tell of the many trips I made back to Queensland – after moving to Sydney – to see her as old age and the effects of a major stroke she had suffered well over 20 years before her death ultimately took hold. But what I cannot ever adequately express in words is the important place she holds in my heart. Her love and legacy will always live on – in and through me.

“I long to hear your laughter,  to look into your eyes … But I know you're right beside me and you're carrying me through ... you’re the lighthouse.” The life of Nessie Rootes may be over on this earth, but from here she goes on – always cherished, always remembered … a part of who and what I am.

Her loving ‘son’ – Rick Rutherford 2006

DOROTHY BETTSY LINTON

1922 - 2006

A TRIBUTE BY SHARI BREWSTER (NSW)

"My mother, Bettsy Linton, was born on 19th January 1922. As a teenager she was strikingly beautiful and a talented ballet dancer. The outbreak of World War II put an end to dreams of being on the stage, but she retained her love of classical music and the arts all her life.

"When she met Eddis Linton towards the end of the war it was ‘love at first sight’ and for the next 62 years neither of them had eyes for anyone else. Mum sadly passed away on 4th July 2006, just 5 months short of their 60th wedding anniversary.

"I was their only child and the three of us were very close. Mum was a wonderful mother to me – gentle, kind, loving and affirming. She taught me right from wrong by example. She was a devoted wife in an age when women saw homemaking as the best career of all. My Dad is devastated by her loss. She was always his beloved.

"I remember her wonderful sense of humour and her quick wit. I will never forget the warmth of her smile or the sound of her lilting, cultured voice. I had polio as an infant, and many were the long nights she sat by my bed when I could not sleep because my legs hurt. I recall her beautiful voice singing me to sleep.

"She was a loving mother-in-law to my dear late husband. She adored our four children and when her first great-grandson was born in 2004 her joy was immense. Her great love of animals led to a succession of cats and dogs that, over the years, shared our lives and our home. Animals loved and trusted her. Lorikeets and possums would come down every day to feed out of her hand. My horses would canter over to the fence at the sound of her voice. I was always bringing home stray animals I had found – she always had room for one more although she did say it was hard when I started bringing horses home!

"Now she has gone, but the world is a better place because she was here. She bore her last final illness – a cruel cancer – with courage and without complaint. She didn’t want to be a burden or for us to make a fuss. But love is a light burden. Sleep peacefully, my angel, in the arms of God.

Shari Brewster 2006

CHARLES EDWARD JAMES KELLY

1940 - 2006

A TRIBUTE BY HIS WIFE, KERRY KELLY-MORONEY

During the time of her late husband Ed’s illness, Kerry wanted to be sure to make his farewell and final journey one that would be beautiful … a perfect day to honour a wonderful life.  As Kerry states “I wanted it to be a celebration and a remembrance of love.”

“In life we sometimes reflect, looking back and wishing that we had done things another way … better. Ed’s farewell was something I would not have another opportunity to undertake, and I wanted it to pay the greatest respect to my darling man. And so I planned his funeral better than our own wedding.

"In his final days, as Ed lay sleeping, I methodically organised all the details. The venue chosen here in Western Australia is called Manja Gardens – a beautiful place with a chapel for weddings. Now they would do funerals too!

"On the day of his service, I had some of the furniture which Eddie had so lovingly handcrafted, displayed within the chapel. My dearest friend presented the eulogy and poured a glass of wine as we drank a toast to Ed, then placed a glass on the coffin as a loving gesture of our life. I had bunches of white and yellow roses and a bowl of freshly-planed sawdust for everyone to sprinkle on his coffin … a tribute to Ed’s passion for woodwork. I also placed his woodworking cap and our wedding photo on the coffin.

"The songs played on the day were all specially chosen for their significant meaning … from his favourite 'Albatross', to our wedding song and our favourite waltz music. All the prayers and readings were written specially for the occasion too. The flowers had to be all white and yellow, signifying our love, faithfulness, loyalty and the devotion we shared during our life together.

"With the wonderful help of my daughter and her dearest friends from Koble Catholic College, we planned a CD and DVD overhead projection of Ed’s wonderful years with us. It was glorious.

"The hearse had to be white – I didn't want any black mourning colours for Ed’s day. I chose two lots of pallbearers: one group of family to bring his coffin into the chapel; the other being my brothers and myself to carry Ed on his final journey at the end of the service, with a beautiful bouquet of yellow roses placed on the roof of the hearse as it drove away.

"Five huge frames of photographic displays were presented at the wake which was held at the fantastic Golf Links at Secret Harbour. The Links had never hosted a wake before either. It was fabulous as the kids and the grandchildren of some of our friends grabbed practice balls and took club in hand. Of course, Eddie was a golfer and at the time of his untimely passing was in the process of having shoulder reconstruction to enable him to get back into his beloved sport.

"The support of my children, my family and our friends has been enormous. I know how much they all miss him. But no one will truly know the heartfelt sorrow I feel each day without him.

"You may think it strange that I write about his funeral, but this was my

final chance to show Ed how much he really meant to me.  He was my diamond, my

inspiration for life, my true gentleman who loved me, supported me in

every way … emotionally, spiritually and practically. He reinforced me and swept away any doubts I ever had. But now I feel totally lost without him. His smile will never leave my heart. My soul mate is at rest and peaceful. Goodbye my darling man."

Kerry Kelly-Moroney (September 2006)

If you would like to make a contribution to 'In Memory' please don't hesitate to contact me via email at rick@rickrutherford.com as I will be delighted to assist in any way I can to acknowledge the lasting legacy of a loved one lost.